Monday, December 21, 2015

How Advent is Like Being Pregnant

“We as a society have it completely backward: In our impatient, instant-gratification culture, the idea of being patient and anticipating a big event can seem beyond us,” write Tom and Caroline McDonald on the subject of Advent.

I am definitely guilty of having this attitude. The kind of anticipation which asks me to deny myself or slow myself down is one I generally dislike, and eagerness is oftentimes something I celebrate as a virtue.

This year, I resolved to observe Advent more meaningfully, and it helped me to recognize the ways in which observing Advent—waiting for the coming of Christ with joy and reverence—is a lot like waiting five more months to give birth to my son.

The preparation aspect of Advent is unique. Advent asks us to prepare specifically for the coming of Christ, as St. John the Baptist did through his preaching of repentance. In this season, we are preparing to welcome someone in. If we really think about it, this kind of preparation must be active and intentional, and it cannot occur in a short period of time. The season of Advent lasts three and a half weeks, which is definitely a sufficient amount of time to transition our hearts from busyness and bustle to steadiness, patience, and hope.


I certainly don’t know everything about waiting for a baby to come. I’ve seen women who are nearing or at their due dates, and their attitude and manner is distinctly urgent. The baby could come at any moment for them, and they are keenly aware of that. When I compare the waiting of Advent and waiting for a baby to come, I refer to the longer waiting and preparation which comes in the nine months of pregnancy: for example, making dietary changes, buying clothes and equipment for the baby, saving money, learning the techniques and everything else one needs to know to care for a baby…the list goes on. To prepare effectively for a baby takes time. I’m just starting to make headway! Preparing for my little baby on earth takes time, and it makes sense that preparing for Christ to come—even as a tiny baby—can certainly take three weeks, or even a lifetime.

In a culture which often dismisses preparation as boring and unnecessary, every day of preparation becomes a new act of willingness for me.
I intentionally choose to prepare, and in doing so I mirror the choice that the Virgin Mary made to assent to God’s will (as told to her by the angel Gabriel): “be it unto me according to thy word.”


Mary’s response should be a goal for our lives as Christians. Our sanctification could not have a greater culmination than our complete willingness to assent unto the will of God. In my lifetime, as I’m being sanctified, I’m sure that parenting will, at times, be a test of my willingness. Am I willing to give a patient explanation to my child instead of a sharp answer? Am I willing to prioritize (and enforce) healthy habits of eating, sleeping, and playing, even when I’m met with vehement resistance? Am I willing to guide an older child along the right path of friendships and choices, instead of “letting them figure it out themselves?” My willingness will be key in parenting, just as it is key in Advent. We are willing to restrain ourselves for three weeks in order to fully understand and enjoy the twelve days of Christmas. We are willing to be patient (in a society which glories in impatience) because this preparation for Christ's coming is important enough to surpass our personal desires. I will try to be patient in pregnancy, because I know I am being prepared for something bigger and more important.


Advent asks hard things of us, and so does bearing and raising a child. I know that I am young, and in so many ways I don’t know the half of it. What I do know is that Advent, like parenting, gives us the opportunity to become more like Christ—and the God who asks us to wait and prepare is the same God who never forsakes us but instead gives us grace to walk the path of preparation.

As Advent draws to a close, and the season of Christmas begins, let us rejoice in the grace of God’s son, who came at exactly the right time to bring salvation to our fallen world.
“Rejoice in the Lord always; and again I say, rejoice!” (Philippians 4:4).

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